A season full of reasons

Khushee sent me this poem today. I don't know if she wrote it or if its a forwarded mail, but I thought I would share it with you. Its the V-Day and the air is full of bombs.. err.. poems ;-)

To the tune of 'If you're happy and you know it..."

If you cannot find Osama, bomb Iraq.
If the markets are a drama, bomb Iraq.
If the terrorists are frisky,
Pakistan is looking shifty,
North Korea is too risky, bomb Iraq.

If we have no allies with us, bomb Iraq.
If we think someone has dissed us, bomb Iraq.
So to hell with the inspections,
Let's look tough for the elections,
Close your mind and take directions, bomb Iraq.

It's "pre-emptive non-aggression", bomb Iraq.
Let's prevent this mass destruction, bomb Iraq.
They've got weapons we can't see,
And that's good enough for me,
'Cos it'all the proof I need, bomb Iraq.

If you never were elected, bomb Iraq.
If your mood is quite dejected, bomb Iraq.
If you think Saddam's gone mad,
With the weapons that he had,
(And he tried to kill your dad), bomb Iraq.

If your corporate fraud is growin', bomb Iraq.
If your ties to it are showin', bomb Iraq.
If your politics are sleazy,
And hiding that ain't easy,
And your manhood's getting queasy, bomb Iraq.

Fall in line and follow orders, bomb Iraq.
Follow our might knows not our borders, bomb Iraq.
Disagree? We'll call it treason,
Let's make war not love this season,
Even if we have no reason, bomb Iraq.

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Btw, Happy Valentines day everyone. :-)

What a shame

What a shame indeed. Shame for humanity and for cricket. Finally England had its way of not playing in the Zimbabwe during this world cup. I have spoken loudly and debated against this issue with my colleagues here in London. And to be honest they are more confused than I am. Maybe it is me who needs a lesson in logic and reasoning (I can see some of you agreeing whole heartedly by nodding your head).

Lets see, we have British White Farmers being forced out of Zimbabwe and they are trying to fight back. We might have some Mugabe supporters in the stand who want see the Farmers give up their land and go back to England... Then we have Non-Supporters protesting outside the stadium. This is a big BIG issue according to my fellow Englishmen. I cooly asked them - how would you feel if the 5% of the Asians (like me) controlled 90% of your prime farm land, and expected all the whites to work for me? Hyuk hyuk, that tickled them right to their bones.

Well at least we know that Zimbawe isn’t a democracy; but then again what do we make of the Tory party member who wants all asylum seekers sent back as he claims they are all "Terrorists"!! Hell ya, everyone has the freedom to exhibit their ignorance.

Couple this with the High Lords of morals and ethics, the Austrailians (you in the back, stop shouting 'shame Warne'), who feel that it would be against their principles to play in Zimbabwe. Aren't these the same cricketers who shouted 'Black Cu*t' and 'Black Monkey' to the touring members of the Srilankan team? Of course the Australian crowd had much better slang vocabulary than its players. Hell ya, its a free world - what's wrong in a bit of racism.

Only disclaimer is that, this post is in no way my justification of Mugabes rule. Rather I wish he is on the next hit list of Americans. I just feel upset that these morally drunk countries get away so lightly. I hope Zimbabwe players cancel their tour of England.

To hang or not to hang...

I don't know how many of you have read Perry Mason books but if you get a chance I would recommend you to give it a try. I have read most of the series and I enjoyed them thoroughly. A couple of days back while watching some comedy on TV, the host interviews a Perry Mason impersonator (btw, Perry Mason was a fictional character like Sherlock Holmes). The host begins by uttering the usual salutations and then says,

"Perry, I always wanted to ask you this. Now, suppose a thief happens to enter a house to commit robbery. But ends up being pushed into a corner by the house owner. In this predicament the thief takes out his gun and shoots the owner. The bullet hits the owner right in the head but he doesn't die. Instead the owner goes into a deep coma and becomes a vegetable. A whole year passes and the family of the house-owner realise that the victim is 'brain-dead' and decide to pull the plug from the life support system. The question is this: Does the thief face the charges of 'murder' or an 'attempted murder'?"

Of course this was asked by the comedy show host to put Perry Mason in a fix, and make the audience laugh. But to me its more than just humour. I wonder what the correct legal position on such a case is. Any of you have any idea(s)?

The making of Second Blood

Seriously, how long do you think it will take the people of Hollywood to come up with a movie on Iraq war? I have a feeling the bloody part of the war will be over quite quick. Of course there will be a bit of cleaning up or trashing the odd soldiers who put a puny resistance. But should the war start on say March 6th, I presume it will be over by end of May.

You must be thinking why I chose March 6th for the starting day of war? Well it makes sense. March 5th is the last day of the Holy Month when Muslims will visit Mecca. The next day is Thursday. So on the night of March 6th / early morning March 7th (being Friday) will be the most likely time of attack. Just like it did in the first Gulf war - on the night of Jan 17th America and its allies started their attacks.

Ok back to saner things in life - like movies! I wonder who will play the role of Saddam. How about Arnold Schwarzenegger with a moustache? Ok ok.. I know Saddam is not so muscular... but hey Hollywood movies always depict the enemy as larger than lfie. Arny's accent could give a further realism (remember Arny speaking Arabic in True Lies?). The tough call will be on finding a perfect match for Bush. It’s hard to find someone who will match his intellect. Probably with a little bit of Bush-isms the movie could be a action / true story / comedy block buster. I reckon we will see "Second Blood - part 1" by the second anniversay of 9/11 (First Blood is exclusively for Stalonne and Vietnam).

Of course Hollywood will need help from their counterparts in Bollywood because this story will need a heroine if it is to attract audience. And only our Bollywood directors have mastered the art of sprinkling in oomph looking ladies especially when they are not relevant. Probably it will go down in history as the first Hollywood & Bollywood co-production. I just can't wait to see this movie hit the theatres ;-)

Atlantis

Atlantis. What a nice word. The first time I heard that word was in 1995, when I got my own copy of the PC game "Indiana Jones and the Fate of Atlantis". I played that RPG for many weeks before I completed it. And only after completing the game did I bother to go look up an encyclopaedia what Atlantis is all about.

Some say Atlantis was an island while some say it was an entire continent. I believe it was the former because if it was a continent we surely would have found some traces of it by now. It is supposed to have existed about 10-15000 years ago and was believed to be a highly civilised place. Plato makes a detailed mention about Atlantis in his books. Theories suggest that Atlantis was so developed that its people used vehicles to move around, there was electricity, trains, buses, and all such gadgets that we find in our daily lives. Some suggest that it was probably even more advanced than today's London or NY. Ok I know that' a bit too stretched and personally I don't believe it was that advanced - but its likely the city of Atlantis was more developed than Rome / Egypt / Incas was in their Golden period.

What happened to Atlantis then? Well according to theorists - it sank. The whole of Atlantis Island was basically a volcanic mountain and it sank due to some seismic activity. And ever since then archaeologists have been diligently searching for this mythical island. There is a village in Spain, where everyone has six fingers on each hand - and they claim that they are descendants of the people who lived in fabled Atlantis. If you are interested in reading about Atlantis - then do a Google and you will find dozens of useful links.

Now why did I suddenly write about this out of the blue? Well recently Reuters reported that a volcanic island submerged off the coast of Sicily for the last 170 years could reappear in the coming weeks if furious seismic rumblings continue. Ok that’s great news! But what's not so great is the diplomatic row that has been brewing since then. Over the centuries, the island has emerged four times, with underwater volcanic eruptions first recorded during the first Punic War of 264-241 BC.

The last emergence on July 2, 1831, caused months of international wrangling with four nations making territorial claims including Britain, Spain and the Bourbon court of Sicily. The rock, which rose some 65 metres (213 ft) above the surface and had a circumference of about five km (three miles), emerged for six months, giving the British time to claim it as Graham Island, while Sicily's King Ferdinand II called it Ferdinandea. Scientists refer to it as Graham Bank. This time, Sicilian divers have gone down and planted a flag on the rock in the hope of claiming it as Italian the moment it rises above the surface. Meanwhile European Union is busy getting its papers ready to make a special claim - to have it as a neutral base for all EU members. I hope Bush doesn't make a claim for it too ;o) By the way Atlantis was supposed to me in the 'middle of the earth' and Mediterranean means 'middle of the earth' :o)

And just to continue to grow my knowledge on such mundane issues, I got myself three new video games this weekend: Caesar III, Tombraider 3, F18 Hornet :o)