Last night, I was a light house :)

Being a light house is not easy. You got to keep turning your neck round and round so that stupid humans don't come and crash into you. I mean how idiotic is that? Who asked them to go and play in the water middle of the night anway. If you ask me they should just stay put at home and read comics. But then again, everyone doesn't share my views. So last night, there I was beaming my lamp all around and suddenly I could see some reflection on the horizon. I knew it was those stupid guys showing off that they can sail in the night. I ignored for a while. Then I saw those ships coming at me. Decided to yell at them and say "watch your way buddy, you're gonna crash into me". So out I sent my coded message. These nuts have put a gadget in me to do that... sort of like my personal mobile phone. Nothing fancy but just fine.

I told them: "Please change your course 10 degrees north to avoid collision".
They replied: "Negative. You change your course 10 degrees south"
I said: "Sorry, you change your course 10 degree north"
They sort of yelled: "YOU change your course 10 degree south"
I sighed: "Im sorry you will have to change course"
They waited a minute and I could tell they were angry: "This is the USS Lincoln, second largest armoured ship on the Atlantic. We have nuclear missiles, torpedoes, rockets and a variety of artillery. The ship is accompanied by four other support vehicles. You change your course 10 degree south or we will take all preventive measures to avoid collision".
I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. I calmly replied: "Im a light house... f**k off!"

Of course I think the last two words made them change their course.
Moral: always use strong words with people who act tough.